Friday, November 16, 2012

Nose Job Makes Man Constantly Smell Grilled Alaskan Salmon In Lime-Cilantro Sauce Over Buckwheat Couscous


—"They should tell you the operation will lock in one aroma," said Robert Morse. "I would have chosen flame-broiled buffalo with persimmon chutney and a side of truffled yam fritters." Morse's doctor commented, "Surprising. Most patients end up smelling rack of lamb in balsamic thyme butter with mushroom-millet pilaf." Morse's insurance only covers cases where the lifelong smell is brandy-braised Cornish game hen over ginger-apple scented rhubarb noodles. "I can live with it," says Morse, who since this paragraph began has married a woman who can only smell crabgrass-marinated pork rind in smoked watermelon seed puree wrapped in kale-infused maple bark with Amazonian porcupine eyelash brittle. Doctors say their offspring will smell corn.